Graduation!

In this post, I talk about how excited I was about graduating Jr. High. 4 years later, I’m talking about how relieved I am that a little over 24 hours ago, I graduated High School.

 

Walking across the (rickety, mildly horrifying) stage extension in low, chunky heels because God forbid I catch a stiletto in the gap between the stage and its extension. I have great legs I’d love to keep them. and getting my diploma was the happiest I’ve been in years. I wish that was a dramatic exaggeration.

The “best” 4 years of my life came with a lot of struggles. I lost a lot of friends, and sadly, I had a majority of them for years, some since grade school. (Yes, the “friend” I was speaking to at the end of this post is on that list, too. I discovered that she is incredibly petty and doesn’t want to grow up.) I said very few words to them at graduation, and I doubt I’ll say very many more in the future. I wasn’t in a good place mentally, either. I spent too many nights at my absolute worst, ugly crying on the bathroom floor at ungodly hours of the night and thinking of doing things to myself that I hope never come up as an option again. (That unintentionally sounds like the “edgy” teenage type…)

I made some really good memories. Going to dances, staying out late, sitting in a hot tub at 2:30 AM, trying not to ruin the hair and makeup your mom paid the salon to do. I did the play/musical every year, and I stayed in Band. I was also an honors graduate, keeping a 3.5 GPA every semester. I wore my medal for hours after the ceremony. I’m grateful for the memories, but I know I won’t miss anything about them.

High School was not a good time in my life, but I’m accepting of  the way it changed me. I don’t think High School should be the “best four years of your life”. It’s also nothing like the movies or TV shows try portraying it. I think it’s a time when you’re supposed to figure things out. I walked into High School a terrified 14 year old girl , and I walked out as a completely different 18 year old. (I’m glad I got to be that 14 year old for a while, though. You have to start somewhere) Am I a bit scared of the future? Absolutely, but I know that I can handle whatever tries to bring me down.